Featured Story

week of February 8, 2020

Symptoms of Disorganization

by Gordon MacDonald

None of us wants to come to the end of life and look back with regrets on things that could have been accomplished but were not. But to prevent that from happening, it is necessary to understand how we can command the time God has given to us.

Let us first consider the traits of the disorganized life. Some of these symptoms may seem a bit ridiculous, even petty. Let me suggest a handful of sample symptoms.

When I am slipping into disorganization, for example, I know it because my desk takes on a cluttered appearance. The same thing happens to the top of my bedroom dresser. In fact almost every horizontal surface in the path of my daily travel becomes littered with papers, [emails] to which I have not responded, and pieces of tasks left unfinished. I can see some spouse saying, “Here, read this.” But my desk can be another’s kitchen counter, bedroom furniture, work bench, or basement workroom. The same principle applies.

The symptoms of disorganization tend to show themselves in the condition of my car. It becomes dirty inside and out. I lose track of the maintenance schedule, and I am pressing deadlines on oil changes and rotating tires.

When disorganization takes over, I become aware of a diminution of my self-esteem. I feel the slightest tinge of paranoia, a low-level fear that people are going to discover they are not getting their money’s worth out of my labor, that I am not the person they thought I was.

I know I’m disorganized when there are a series of forgotten appointments, phone and email messages to which I have failed to respond, and deadlines I have begun to miss. The day becomes filled with broken commitments and lame excuses. (Some days events beyond our control conspire to derail even the most organized.)

If I am disorganized, I tend to invest my energies in unproductive tasks. I actually find myself watching a screen or doing small and boring things just to get something accomplished. There is a tendency toward daydreaming, an avoidance of decisions that have to be made, and procrastination.

Disorganized people feel poor about their work. What they manage to finish they do not like. They find it hard to accept the compliments of others. In the secrecy of their hearts they know that they have turned in a second-best job.

Disorganized Christians rarely enjoy intimacy with God. They certainly have intentions of pursuing that friendship, but it never quite gets established. No one has to tell them that time must be set aside for Bible study and reflection, for intercession, for worship. They know all of that. They simply are not doing it. They excuse themselves, saying there is no time, but within their private worlds they
know it is more a matter of organization and personal will than anything else.

If I am in a state of disorganization, the quality of my personal relationships usually reveals it. The days pass without a significant conversation with my son or daughter. My wife and I will be in contact, but our conversations may be shallow and unaffirming. I may become irritable, resenting any attempt to correct my course, no matter how tactfully it’s pointed out. 

The fact of the matter is that when we are disorganized in our control of time, we just don’t like ourselves, our jobs, or much else about our worlds. And it is difficult to break the destructive pattern that settles in.

This terrible habit-pattern of disorganization must be broken, or our private worlds will fall quickly into total disorder. We must resolve to seize control of our time.

—Condensed from Ordering Your Private World

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